In Cooking and Marriage, a Little Spice Makes a Big Difference


I don’t cook dinner very often. I think Jean prefers it that way. Her degree is in bio-chemistry. Not only is she smart, but she naturally thinks in terms of precision.  Recipes are to be followed. If the instructions call for one cup of flour, she’ll measure exactly one cup. She’ll even use a knife to scrape off the excess, so the amount is perfect. I’ve even seen her add more if it’s not quite full.

Finding New Life after the Death of a Spouse

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No matter how strong your faith, the death of a spouse can rattle it. That’s how deeply a heart can be broken. The richer the love, the worse the suffering.

Tricia and Robb’s love was like that, thanks to God’s grace and a lot of hard work. Early on in their marriage, Tricia felt ungrateful for Robb. Over time, her ingratitude grew into openly criticizing him.  His quirks and idiosyncrasies, once so charming, became irritating.

But Tricia and Robb got to work and built a strong and fulfilling marriage.

How to Avoid Christmas Debt


Jean, the boys and I are having a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday together. I hope your family is too.

 Although depending on when Black Friday sales began in your neighborhood, Thanksgiving was probably over well before your clocks struck midnight earlier this morning.

The race to Christmas has begun.

 With every retailer fighting over your hard-earned dollar for the next four weeks, do you worry it’ll take until next Christmas to get this Christmas paid off?

 Americans spent nearly $580 billion last year for Christmas.

The Secret to a Happy Life with Your Wife

Husband kissing wife's forehead

They say the eyes are a window to the soul.

If that’s true, husbands, then what are the eyes of your wife telling you?

Do they seem alive and vibrant? Or are they tired and withdrawn? The difference could lie in how she sees herself in your eyes.

God’s Word couldn’t be more clear about the incalculable worth of women. Genesis 2:18 says, “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him’” (ESV).

The Common ‘Language’ Marriages Around the World Share


“It’s just like an American to think you invented the family.”

That’s what Dr. Lilian Wahomey, a psychologist in Kenya, jokingly said to me over lunch one day. I met with her almost 25 years ago to explore ways Focus on the Family could come alongside families in Africa.

“Do you think our focus on marriage and parenting will be relevant in this part of the world?” I had asked.

With a friendly smile, she reminded me that the core needs of marriages and families transcend language, culture, nationality, and socio-economic status.

Helping Military Couples Navigate Home Life


“I always say that the loneliest place I’ve ever been in my life is not Afghanistan but in my own bed … with my wife’s back turned to me.”

That comment from veteran Chad Robichaux resonates with a lot of military couples, who sacrifice and endure demands on their marriages most civilians don’t understand.

After 9/11, Chad’s special ops unit did eight tours of duty in Afghanistan. Survival in the war-torn Middle East requires good training and high degrees of adrenaline and emotional intensity.

The Foundation to a Fulfilling Marriage


My marriage enjoyed a significant boost a couple of summers ago on a family vacation to Glacier National Park in Montana.

Jean, the boys, and I hiked to a place called Hidden Lake but were stopped several hundred yards away. It was spawning season for the trout, and the bears were especially active. Still, from where we were, we could see the bears splashing through the water hunting for fish.

I should say my boys and I could see them.

Are You Worried Your Spouse Isn’t Your Soul Mate?

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Are you worried your spouse isn’t your soul mate?

Well, let me encourage you with this: soul mates aren’t found, they’re formed over time.

Juana Mikels and her husband, Terry, are proof of that. College sweethearts, they walked down the aisle believing the planets had surely aligned in order for them to find each other. But just two years into their marriage, the planets had all but fallen out of their orbits.

Juana was convinced she had married the wrong person.

How to See More Deeply into Your Spouse’s Heart


Picture yourself in an antique store.

You’re standing before an old chair, its wood dinged up and the varnish dirty and worn. At first, you have trouble seeing past the grime and scratches to appreciate its craftsmanship.

But what if, just as you turn to leave the store, you discovered the chair belonged to Abraham Lincoln? Suddenly, instead of a banged up old relic, you’re looking at a piece of history.

What happened? The chair didn’t change.

Five Ways Singles Can Honor Marriage (Guest Post)

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As a single person, sometimes I look around and wonder what happened to marriage.

In my Millennial demographic, it seems like more people are choosing to live together or hookup with someone on Tinder than choosing to tie the knot.

The studies show that there’s a growing pool of young single adults who seem to have little drive to marry. A recent Pew Research study  found that most Millennials won’t marry until at least age 27, and 25 percent will never marry at all.