Reducing Drama in Your Relationships

The holiday season can be one of the most joyful times of the year. It can also be one of the most stressful.

Spending time with family during Thanksgiving and Christmas sounds enjoyable when you’re making plans in July and August. But once November and December arrive, you remember what it’s like to be in a house filled with people who have different interests, different traditions, even differing political and spiritual viewpoints.

Which begs the question: how can we navigate the holidays in a way that honors our families in a Christlike way?

Authors Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory are here to help. They’re joining me on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly to share practical ideas from their book Overwhelmed: How to Quiet the Chaos and Restore Your Sanity.

They say that feeling overwhelmed usually comes from high expectations that don’t match reality. The solution is to have strategies for maneuvering through the holidays that enable us to be as flexible as possible with our expectations.

That may include:

Setting ground rules that curtail religious or political debate around the dinner table.
Creating opportunities for introverts in the family to have space away from the larger group.
Establishing windows of time where smartphones and technology are turned off and family members engage face-to-face.
Be prepared for give and take. When you’re with family, be fully present and be willing to treat their desires with importance, but know your limits as well. As Paul says in Romans 12:18, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”

Kathi and Cheri address several of the most common scenarios that cause stress at the holidays, including the ever-growing list of “must have/do” factors that can creep into family gatherings but aren’t truly necessary. They also offer advice for setting good boundaries and dealing with “crisis creators” within the family – one of whom might be you.

Hear my full conversation with Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory on your local radio station, online, on Apple Podcasts, or listen on our free phone app.

Kathi and Cheri’s book Overwhelmed: How to Quiet the Chaos and Restore Your Sanity is available through our ministry for a gift of any amount. Click here for more information or call 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459).

And when you help Focus on the Family today with a gift, your donation will be DOUBLED for twice the impact in helping others through this ministry. Our thanks to generous donors who’ve made that possible.

Before I close, I know that the holidays can be a difficult time of year when people feel overwhelmed or depressed. We’re here for you. We have caring Christian counselors to talk with you, to help you, and to refer you to a Christian counselor in your area if necessary. If you’re hurting, please give us a call at 1-800-A-FAMILY (800-232-6459).