Jim Daly

When a teacher asked 15-year-old Daniel Harrison from Nottingham, England if he had any goals, he said he wanted a friend.

Daniel’s parents wondered how well Daniel, who has autism, understood the concept of friendship. He had never expressed a desire before and seemed quite happy. Nevertheless, Daniel’s parents shared his story on social media to ask people to send Daniel a birthday greeting. Their message went viral.

Within hours, they received over 120,000 likes and 50,000 comments, including kind words from celebrities like Russell Crowe and Mark Hamill.

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In the U.S., 63% of people have some kind of blended family relationship.

That is a massive number of homes trying to figure out a whole new normal, blending different backgrounds, routines, and personalities under one roof. The trouble is, there is no one-size-fits-all playbook for making it all work. It’s rarely smooth. Everyone involved has to learn how to navigate new boundaries, build trust from scratch, and figure out where they fit in. It takes patience, plenty of messy conversations, and a lot of grace to get everyone on the same page.

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On Focus on the Family with Jim Daly, I’m joined by researcher and author Shaunti Feldhahn, who explains what happy married couples do to be … well, happy.

Her premise is simple: the best way to have a good marriage is to learn what happy couples do and then emulate them. To discover what those things are, Shaunti surveyed thousands of married couples who reported high degrees of satisfaction in their marriage. Specifically, she asked what they did to lay a strong foundation for their relationship and how they handled problems when they developed.

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Author Crystal Paine discovered something surprising when she surveyed 4,000 married women about their family’s finances. Most, regardless of their income level, expressed a level of fear and uncertainty.

She also discovered that much of this unsettled emotion is rooted in the generalized belief that we need “more” in order to feel secure. That is, we need more money, more time, more experience, etc.

Crystal understands. She and her husband, Jesse, spent the early years of their marriage struggling to make ends meet while caring for a toddler and a newborn.

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Death is a topic none of us likes to talk about.

Rationally, we know that death is inevitable, but the complex reactions of grief, fear, and anger associated with it are rarely rational.

Author Jen Babakhan was forced to wrestle with the harsh realities of death on Mother’s Day weekend a few years ago when her dad called early one morning to say that doctors had discovered tumors in her mom’s liver, lungs, and bones. She had stage 4 cancer with a life expectancy of 6-8 weeks.

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God works through everyday mundane experiences, but He especially shows up in life’s messiest moments. Author Cynthia Yanof believes God turns our mess into His message.

She says, “The truth is, all the seemingly small things end up being the big things because each of the mishaps, annoyances, and character-building moments are beautifully crafting the very DNA of your family.”

Over the years, Cynthia has seen God work through her family struggles to refine them into who they are today.

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How should you respond if your child is questioning his or her sexual identity?

We routinely hear from Christian parents who are navigating this issue. It’s so difficult and complex that it’s easy to feel overcome by emotion and to react poorly. Responses often range from fear and anger to pain and betrayal. But there’s a third option.

Grace.

With grace, it is possible to emulate Christ by listening empathetically and by leaning into your child’s pain and confusion.

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Marriage is a beautiful gift from God. But every couple faces challenges, both internal and external, that threaten to tear them apart. Some of those challenges stem from cycles of childhood trauma that are carried into adulthood and repeated.

Speaker and counselor Dan Allender nearly repeated his own cycle of trauma while skiing with his family. His son became afraid of the run they’d chosen, which made Dan angry. When he started yelling at his son to participate, Dan’s wife, Becky, stepped between them and placed her hand over Dan’s heart.

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Author Trisha Davis says you’re either a rule follower or a rule breaker.

Rule followers compare themselves to others, so much so that their moral compass becomes legalism, a strict adherence to rules.

• Negatively, this can result in a superficial, performance-based faith.

• Positively, rule followers are predictable and dependable, which fosters trust and security in their relationships.

Rule breakers are creative, push boundaries, and operate comfortably in the midst of chaos.

• Negatively, their disregard for structure often leads to reckless choices, which make relationships difficult.

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