marriage Archives

The Relationship Agreement

Here’s a tip for a great marriage: have a hearty relationship agreement.

Relationship agreements were a funny plot line in the hit television show The Big Bang Theory. The lead character is Dr. Sheldon Cooper, a brilliant physicist who is so analytical that his personality and social habits are nearly robotic. In one episode, he enters into a romantic relationship with fellow academic, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. But because Sheldon disregards human emotion in favor of logic and reason, he creates a relationship agreement – a very detailed relationship agreement.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage September 13, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Dealing with Emotional Disconnection in Marriage

I don’t think I’m overstating things when I say that most men have trouble opening up emotionally. Guys put up walls around their feelings for lots of reasons, but the consequence is always the same. They’re disconnected from deeper, more meaningful experiences with their spouse, children, and friends.

Men don’t usually use the word “disconnected” to describe themselves (we prefer descriptors like “lone wolf” or the “strong, silent type”), but as Shakespeare said, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” A disconnected man is one who is unaware that he is nonrelational, distant, and emotionally unavailable.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage September 5, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Restoring Hope to Your Marriage

Ron and Opal Erickson call themselves “musicianaires.” Ron is an accomplished steel guitarist, and Opal is an accomplished vocalist. They’ve made beautiful music together for over 40 years, not only as musicians but as a couple.

But they only achieved that because they’ve rebuilt their marriage out of the rubble of a relationship that seemed irreparably broken. Through God’s grace and wisdom, they survived adultery, rejection, and betrayal and created a new marriage forged in trust, love, and grace.

Topics: Current Events Tags: faith, marriage August 26, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Two Ingredients of Successful Marriages

“It’s just like an American to think you invented the family.”

That’s what Dr. Lilian Wahomey, a psychologist in Kenya, jokingly said to me years ago. We were exploring ways Focus on the Family could come alongside families in Africa. Since that conversation, I’ve been to more than 70 countries, but at the time I hadn’t done much international travel, so I wondered if the needs of American couples differed from couples around the world.

So I asked Dr.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage August 14, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Becoming Teammates in Your Marriage

Dr. Josh Straub says, “Communication in marriage is overrated.”

What he means is that most couples believe the root of conflict is what they’re communicating about – money, sex, chores, stress, parenting styles, etc. Dr. Straub says conflict is about a couple’s “meta-communication” – that is, how they communicate with each other: their tone of voice and their attitude toward each other.

That’s why couples often can’t remember what they fight about, but they do remember feeling angry, hurt, abandoned, or betrayed after their conflict.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage July 29, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

More Fun Than Marriage Counseling

Why does love often fade over the years of a marriage? One reason is that many couples don’t spend nearly enough time having fun and laughing together. They’re so stressed by the daily pressures of making life work that they slowly push laughter and fun to the wayside – often without even noticing it’s happening. Worse yet, a vital piece of the couple’s marriage usually disappears with the fun.

The Greek philosopher Plato once said, “You can learn more about a man in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.” I think he meant that fun and laughter can reveal things about a person you won’t notice in routine situations.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: faith, marriage July 24, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Practical Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage

A door-to-door salesman from a local cable company once stopped by Dave and Ashley Willis’ house with an offer they couldn’t refuse. At least, that’s how good the offer sounded at first. The man promised his company would take good care of Dave and Ashley and give them the best package at the best price.

However, the deal went south when Dave asked the salesman, “How long is this package available at this price?”

“Twelve months,” the salesman said.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: faith, marriage July 19, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Strengthening Your Marriage Through Daily Choices

If your marriage is in trouble, I have one question: Do you believe God can work a miracle in your relationship?

Even if your answer is no, I encourage you to tune in to Focus on the Family with Jim Daly to hear the story of Ron and Jody Zappia. To say that they had a shaky start to their marriage is an understatement. Within the first six months, Jody was overcommitted in her career and Ron had an affair with a co-worker.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: faith, marriage June 28, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

A Beautiful Vow

Every couple hopes for a good marriage, but wishful thinking isn’t enough to sustain a relationship when life gets hard. For that, you need a vow.

One of the most beautiful examples I’ve witnessed of a couple who honored their marriage vows is my friends, Don and Barbara Hodel. Don spent his career in Washington, D.C. alongside some of the most powerful people in the world, even serving for a time under President Ronald Reagan. Don and Barbara seemed to have it all.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: marriage June 18, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Understanding Your Spouse’s Emotions

For a stronger marriage, ask yourself, “What’s my EQ?”

Your IQ is a measure of your intelligence. Your EQ is a measure of your “emotional intelligence.”

The term “EQ” was coined in 1995 by Daniel Goleman, who first applied the concept to businessmen and businesswomen. As he defined it, emotional intelligence is the degree to which you are able to make healthy relational choices based on your understanding of your emotions and the emotions of those around you.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage June 17, 2024 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura