Daly Focus Blog
Not much can exploit a couple’s differences like Hollywood. So, when Kirk and Chelsea Cameron married in 1991, they knew they were attempting to build a life together in a place notorious for tearing marriages down.
They spent the first several months on the lookout for outside dangers to their relationship. But a conflict one night in their kitchen taught them that the culture surrounding them wasn’t the most significant influence on whether or not their marriage would be successful.
Money is one of the biggest sources of conflict in marriage.
There are two important reasons husbands and wives struggle in this area. The first is that a lot of couples assume that the solution to their financial problems is more money. It’s not. Extra income may ease a few immediate financial pressures, but it’s usually not a long-term solution.
Generally, the more money a couple earns, the more likely they are to elevate their standard of living and, therefore, their spending.
Dara’s son Timothy was turning three, and to celebrate, friends, grandparents and other family members gathered for his birthday party. All had a great time filled with cake, presents and pictures. Proof was captured in Dara’s numerous social media posts. It was the perfect day that every parent looks forward to.
Unfortunately, Dara had no idea that it would be her last normal day in a long while.
It was the day before she discovered her husband’s pornography use.
Odds are, you or someone you know has stepchildren. According to a recent statistic, 40 percent of families in the United States are blended.
That is a lot of people who are trying to build something new out of the ashes of their former lives. Divorce. Death. Blended families come together for many reasons, but they each face a number of challenges.
On our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Cultivating Love in Blended Families,” authors Dr.
They say the eyes are a window to the soul.
If so, husbands, what are your wife’s eyes telling you? Are they alive and vibrant? Or are they tired and withdrawn?
The difference could lie in how she sees herself in your eyes. Does she see a reflection of herself as described in Scripture? Genesis 2:18 says, “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’”
The Hebrew word for “helper” conveys the idea of a “completer.” Far from being subservient or inferior to their husbands, God has designed wives to be equal companions.
Are you worried that your spouse isn’t your soul mate?
If so, let me encourage you with this: soul mates aren’t found, they’re formed.
Understanding that difference often separates couples who have a healthy, intimate relationship from those who divorce.
Juana Mikels and her husband, Terry, are proof of that. College sweethearts, they walked down the aisle believing the planets must have aligned for them to find each other. Not long into their marriage, however, it was as if the planets had fallen out of their orbits.
Many couples contact Focus on the Family because the intimacy in their marriage has faded. Their relationship is no longer deepening, and they’re growing apart instead of becoming one.
They feel like married roommates.
Drifting in marriage happens when couples stop making their relationship a priority. After the fun of dating and the wedding celebration, other things begin to distract husbands and wives from each other. Work, children, daily schedules, and household responsibilities become the topics of conversation, and spouses stop talking to one another about what they’re thinking and feeling.
How big is your marriage’s joy gap?
Dr. Marcus Warner and Chris Coursey, authors of the book The 4 Habits of Joy-Filled Marriages, describe a “joy gap” as the length of time between moments of joy. If you apply that unit of measurement to your marriage, how long has it been?
Days?
Weeks?
Months?
The joy gap can be especially lengthy if we’re waiting for our circumstances to change, for our spouse to make us joyful, or for God to zap us with joy.
Not many people know how to pursue marriage with purpose.
For example, when you ask single men and women what they’re looking for in a spouse, many seem unprepared to answer that basic question. The most common responses generally have to do with physical attraction. And that’s not unimportant.
But couples who want a marriage that stands the test of time rise beyond that initial connection point. They keep deeper character traits top of mind, understanding that they’re in a relationship with a whole person, not just a body.
The problem with living at a fast pace is that you never see the cracks in your life starting to form.
Bob and Audrey Meisner discovered that was true after they met and married in Bible college. They were passionate about their faith and wanted to change the world together.
Within a few years, they had three kids, were active in a national ministry, and pastored a thriving church. They attended marriage conferences, read books together, and were well-known in their community.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
