The secret to winning in a team sport is no secret at all. Teammates share a common goal, and they work together to achieve it.
That commitment to unity is what makes marriage work, too. Working together as a team isn’t always easy. Joshua and Christi Straub are both experienced counselors, but even they overlook the importance of teamwork from time to time. Like the day Joshua came home and told Christi about all of the exciting projects he had going on at work. He didn’t get the response he expected. Instead of Christi leaning in and engaging him in conversation, she began to cry and asked, “Why don’t you ever ask about me?” When she explained that Joshua hadn’t shown interest in her life for months, his eyes opened to how distracted he’d been by his own pursuits. He hadn’t been working as part of a team, and their marriage suffered.
Fortunately, Joshua and Christi are counselors, so they applied the same practical ideas to their marriage that had helped so many of their clients. Like this one: Every day, Joshua and Christi set aside 10 to 15 minutes to focus on each other. They can sit on the couch, talk in the car, or take a walk, but they avoid conversations about work, their children, or all the things around the house that need to be done. They focus on each other.
That simple idea won’t change your marriage overnight, but 10 minutes a day really can help get your relationship on track. Just remember it’s going to take both of you. You have to work together as a team. When you wear the same uniform, it’s not about “me,” it’s about “we.”
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