Tying Ties

There are a lot of great dads out there, but many men are disengaged from their boys. They don’t see masculinity as a quality they offer to their sons. They see it as something boys figure out on their own.

That was my story. I didn’t have a father to teach me how to be a man. I had to figure it out by myself. But that journey wasn’t easy, and it’s why I can say from experience that leaving a boy in the hands of “trial-and-error” is not ideal.

I remember being frantic before a junior high dance because I didn’t know how to tie a tie. I fumbled with it for a while and ended up just tying it into a knot. Other kids at the dance teased me about it. It was embarrassing.

Some people might dismiss that story and say, “Oh, it was just a tie.” But it was more than that. I needed a father’s guidance, and there was no one there for me. It’s the same story for so many other boys as well.

You see, something profound happens when a dad helps his boy with his tie, or teaches him to drive, or shows him how to shake hands. You’re doing more than transferring a skill. You’re imparting a sense of manhood to him.

Boys don’t automatically develop the character and integrity of true men when they reach adulthood. They learn to become men in the company of other men as they walk and grow through life together.