Anger is like fire. Harness it for something good, and you’ll create a better life for yourself. Misuse or lose control of it, and it’ll burn everything to the ground. That’s a good reason for children to understand the difference between bad anger and good anger.
Bad anger doesn’t improve our lives. It makes things worse. It protests even though nothing harmful or significant is happening. It turns our pet peeves into conflict and stirs up trouble for no other reason than to get our way.
Good anger enables us to confront wrongdoing. It calls us to positive action and helps us confront circumstances that aren’t healthy for us or our family.
On our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Encouraging Your Kids to Discuss Their Feelings,” authors Josh and Christi Straub are with us to help parents better understand their child’s anger. They also share healthy ways to process it. The Straubs describe:
- Why anger is a secondary emotion, often covering up deeper feelings like resentment, betrayal, grief, and fear.
- Why it’s okay to be angry.
- The best way to help your kids name the feeling behind their anger.
- The calming effect of embracing your child when they’re overwhelmed.
- The different states of anger that kids can experience (fight, flight, or freeze) and help parents understand how to help them through each stage.
- Steps for parents to handle their own anger and reactions when talking to or disciplining their children.
Every child feels anger, but not every child knows how to handle it. Hear my full conversation with Josh and Christi Straub on your local radio station, online, on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, via Google Podcasts, or take us with you on our free phone app.
Before I close, I’d like to extend an invitation for you to become a special partner with us through our monthly “Friends of Focus on the Family” program. When you do, I’ll send you a copy of the Straub’s books What Am I Feeling?, What Do I Do with Anger?, and What Do I Do with Worry? as a way of saying thank you for touching others with the love of Christ. You’ll also receive member-exclusive benefits. To make your pledge, or for more information, click here or call us at 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459).