There are two approaches to parenting:
- See your child’s mistakes as problems to fix.
- Understand the “why” behind your child’s behavior to help your child harness their strengths and channel them in positive directions.
The second of those is a strengths-based parenting approach that encourages parents to move beyond the negative (fixing problems or worrying about how poorly the child’s behavior reflects on the parent) and instead parent from positivity: helping your children discover their God-given talent and become the person He created them to be.
Authors Brandon and Analyn Miller say embracing a strengths-based parenting approach has transformed their family. It has taught them to focus on the “Five Es” for helping children discover their strengths:
- Enthusiasm. What activities are they naturally enthusiastic about?
- Ease. What comes easy?
- Excellence. In what areas does objective criteria show excellence?
- Energy. What activities infuse them with energy?
- Enjoyment. What activities do they enjoy?
Strengths-based parenting is rooted in Philippians 4:8 where Paul says, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”
Brandon and Analyn Miller are with us on our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Helping Your Kids Identify Their Strengths” to help you avoid a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting by helping your children discover their unique talents and passions and use them for God’s Kingdom.
They’ll share how to parent like a music conductor who doesn’t produce any sound but who draws out the unique talents of each musician in the orchestra.
We’ve also got a free parenting assessment for you at our website. It will quickly give you an overview of how your family is doing in several key areas. It also offers suggestions for improving the relationships in your home.
Brandon and Analyn Miller’s book Play to Their Strengths: A New Approach to Parenting Your Kids As God Made Them is available for a gift of any amount. For more information, click here.