Restoring Your Marriage After an Affair

Infidelity is one of the top reasons why marriages end in divorce. That should come as no surprise. It’s hard to repair the gaping wounds that an affair rips into a relationship. Many couples choose to walk away. Even Christians often view infidelity as a “get out of jail free card.”

Josh and Katie Walters know firsthand the betrayal and devastation of infidelity. They now serve on staff at Seacoast Church, a multi-campus ministry in South Carolina, but six years into their marriage, Katie confessed that she was having an affair with one of Josh’s best friends. Josh was completely blindsided. He thought they had a great life. They had three children at the time (now seven). He was a pastor. She was a school counselor. Both were pursuing their dreams.

But Katie wasn’t happy. She blamed Josh for her discontent. Over time, Katie’s heart drifted from Josh into an emotional affair of texts, calls, gifts, and more. Josh sought reconciliation, but Katie told Josh she no longer loved him as she once did. Josh responded, “I’m not asking you to find your way back to an old place, I’m inviting you to go to a new place, a deeper place of love.”

I’m talking with Josh and Katie on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly. They share their remarkable story of how God intervened in their broken relationship. They also offer encouragement to couples who are struggling and ready to give up on their marriage. Couples can restore their marriage by learning to STAY:

Start with me. Take ownership of your mistakes. Don’t blame your spouse.
Take quitting off the table. “Escape routes” are no way to fix a marriage.
Allow others to be part of your story. Confession, accountability, and support from fellow Christians will help you rebuild your relationship.
Yield to vision. In addition to his dreams and her dreams, what does God want to do for your marriage?

Hear our full conversation on your local radio station, online, on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, on our free phone app.

If your marriage is troubled, we have caring Christian counselors on staff, and it would be their privilege to offer you a free consultation. Call us, leave your name and number, and they’ll get back with you just as soon as possible. The number during business hours is 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459).

If you’re on the brink of divorce, our Hope Restored marriage intensives can go a long way toward facilitating healing between you and your spouse and bringing restoration to your relationship. The number for Hope Restored is 1-866-875-2915, or click here. The intensives take place in five locations: