Daly Focus Blog
“…and they lived happily ever after.”
Most of the stories you heard in childhood probably ended like that. It’s the stuff of fairy tales with Prince Charming and damsels in distress.
Living happily ever after is also the hope of every couple standing at a wedding altar. Here’s the problem: happiness is an emotion – and a fickle one at that. It comes and goes with nearly every change of circumstances.
When good things happen, we’re happy.
Author Ann Voskamp’s first memory dates back to when she was 4 years old. She was standing on a chair at the kitchen sink with her mother. While they washed dishes, Ann’s 18-month-old sister wandered out the door and into their farmyard.
At that moment, a service truck in search of a neighbor’s farm pulled into the drive leading up to Ann’s farmhouse by mistake. The driver never saw the little girl and killed her. Ann and her mother saw it all unfold through the window.
Happy Independence Day!
As you enjoy barbecues, fireworks, and family time today, I encourage you to tune in to our Focus on the Family Broadcast “The Role of Faith in America’s Founding.” Joining us is historian Rod Gragg, an adjunct professor of history at Coastal Carolina University, and an award-winning author of more than 20 books.
We’re talking about Ron’s book Forged in Faith: How Faith Shaped the Birth of the Nation: 1607-1776.
Instilling virtue in your children is pretty serious business. After all, the adult world is a competitive place, and you want your kids to be prepared.
Unfortunately, that desire leads many parents to bury their children beneath some pretty harsh standards. At report card time, they question why their nearly straight-A student didn’t get that onegrade a little higher. Or maybe they snap at their teenager if he or she shows the slightest sign of irresponsibility.
That kind of response doesn’t adequately reflect most parents’ heart for their children.
Numerous studies show that masculinity is in crisis. Boys are struggling to mature into competent young men, and men and fathers in general are denigrated in the culture.
Even when the criticism is justified, the solution to those problems isn’tto denigrate masculinity. It’s to teach boys how to harness manhood and to channel it in proper ways.
That’s where you come in, mom.
For every study that shows boys are in trouble there’s another showing that boys grow into healthy, strong, and courageous young men when they have healthy and secure attachments with their mothers.
The tingles can get you married. They can also get you divorced.
Dr. Gary Chapman hears a lot about “the tingles.” It begins when couples come to him for premarital counseling, and he asks, “Why do you want to get married?”
However else they answer, one reason they always include is: “We love each other.”
To that, Dr. Chapman asks, “What do you mean, ‘We love each other’?”
After exchanging awkward looks, the couple will usually say something that equates to “the tingles” to which Dr.
The phone company made me mad.
At least, I thoughtit was their fault. I couldn’t get them to understand that their customer service was terrible. They continually overcharged me and disconnected my boys’ phones even though I hadn’t asked them to do it. I had to call them repeatedly for months and had a terrible time getting my account straightened out.
I tried to stay patient, but I finally reached the end of my rope, and the poor customer service representative got the brunt of my attitude.
Forgiveness is a beautiful thing. But, boy, is it difficult.
It doesn’t matter if you’re talking about forgiving yourself or forgiving others, forgiveness doesn’t come naturally to us. In fact, our wounds can be so deep, the struggle to forgive can only be described as “desperate.”
That’s how Duck Dynasty’s Al and Lisa Robertson describe their struggle to forgive each other after their marriage ran aground. Their wounds were too deep to heal apart from the strength and the grace of God.
How do we, as believers, live for Christ in a world that constantly puts self first? Leslie Vernick addresses this highly relevant topic in her book, How to Find Selfless Joy in a Me-First World.
Our culture makes me the highest priority. From social media posts and selfies to the aisles of bookstores that are filled with self-help books – our individualistic, American culture calls us to be the best version of ourselves to the exclusion of God and others.
However, this hyper focus on self is one of Satan’s strategies to make us believe that we are the center of our own universe.
Many of the problems in the church, in our families, and in society could be solved if men were spiritually and emotionally mature – that is, if they were able to meaningfully connect with their God, their wives, and their children.
Men’s ministries often focus on a man’s outward behavior but ignore the deeper influences. Men shouldn’t be coddled like little boys, they should be challenged as men. A man needs another man to step into his life and to challenge him to mature from the little boy he was into the man God is calling him to be.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
