Daly Focus Blog
Conflict over finances can be hard on a marriage. In fact, research shows that couples who argue about money are nearly twice as likely to divorce as those who don’t.
The answer to that dilemma should be easy then, right? Just manage your finances better.
But a lot of couples are surprised to learn that poor money habits are only one part of their trouble. The other part is usually the marriage itself.
Money puts stress on fractures that already exist in a marriage.
Lorain had a passion for helping couples thrive in their marriages.
For 52 years, she crisscrossed the state of Oklahoma with her husband, Homer, as he preached from church to church. Along the way she came up with a succinct formula for marital happiness. Here’s her recipe for a happy marriage:
1 cup consideration
1 cup courtesy
2 cups praise
2 cups flattery carefully concealed
2 cups milk of human kindness
1 gallon faith in God and each other
1 small pinch of in-laws
1 reasonable budget
1 cup contentment
A generous dash cooperation
2 children (at least)
1 cup confidence and encouragement (for each)
1 large or several small hobbies
1 cup blindness to the other’s faults
Flavor with frequent portions of recreation and a dash of happy memories.
“Here’s the story of a lovely lady, who was bringing up three very lovely girls…”
Most of you could probably finish that theme song from memory. The Brady Bunch was the quintessential television family of the early 1970’s, largely because of its wholesome, albeit simplistic, portrayal of blended families.
In the world of television sitcoms, problems are cleanly resolved by the end of each 30-minute episode. But let’s face it, rebuilding a family is rarely as simple as Mike and Carol Brady made it appear.
The only things certain in life are death and taxes.
Oh … and the fact that children are born selfish.
Straight from the womb, kids have no boundaries. They don’t care if their mom and dad are hungry, overworked, or haven’t slept in days. They’ll scream for food when they’re hungry and for a new diaper when the old one has, let’s say, fulfilled its purpose.
Fortunately, there’s nothing in that behavior for parents to worry about because that’s the means God has given infants to have their needs met and to survive.
The differences that nearly ended their marriage were woven into their DNA.
By his own admission, he grew up a pampered Hollywood child actor. She was from a hard-working middle class family in upstate New York and later became an actress herself.
The external pressures they faced were immense as well. No city can exploit a couple’s differences quite like Hollywood. So when actors Kirk and Chelsea Cameron married in 1991, they committed to building a life together in a place notorious for tearing them down.
Have you ever tried to push a fully inflated beach ball under the water and hold it there?
You can only hold it beneath the surface for so long. Sooner or later, your strength will give out, and the ball will pop back up.
It’s a lot like parenting. How so?
Well, to answer that question, we’ve invited Milan and Kay Yerkovich back to our microphones. They were with us a couple of weeks ago to discuss how we develop a deeper connection with our spouse by understanding their love style and ours.
Friends: Three policemen were killed yesterday in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. You can read my thoughts about this terrible news on my Facebook page. -JD
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Have you ever felt like a trapped monkey?
Neither had I until a friend described to me how other cultures hunt for monkeys.
The hunters hollow out a coconut and fasten it to a tree with a rope. Inside the coconut, they put a small portion of food that can be reached through a small hole.
One of the most important responsibilities you have as a parent is passing your faith and values on to your children.
It may also be one of the most challenging tasks before you. And there’s a reason why.
At the 2008 Summer Olympics, both the U.S. men’s and women’s 4 x 100 relay teams were expected to compete for the gold medal. Instead, in a shocking turn of events, neither team even made it to the finals.
If you’re a Christian, you’re aware that God desires to hear your praise and worship.
But what about your anger, or your discouragement, or your frustration that He’s not intervening in your life the way you wanted or expected?
Many Christians have a hard time believing God will tolerate such deep, often unpleasant emotions from His children. They might even say, “Oh, no, no, no. You can’t talk to God like that.”
But the Psalmists felt no such uncertainty.
For many couples, marriage is mostly about the kids.
Well-meaning moms and dads spend so many years completely devoted to the task of raising their children that they often forget to be husband and wife. It’s a situation that may be manageable while the kids are still at home and there’s enough work to “float” the relationship along – but it can become unbearable after the kids move out.
That’s what puts empty-nest marriages at higher risk for dissatisfaction – and even divorce.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
