The Danger of Over-Protecting Boys

Moms, the Lord is depending on your boys to be wolves.

In the first six weeks of a baby cub’s life, a wolf never leaves the den or his mother. She nurtures him and teaches him to take care of himself.

At six weeks of age, the cub leaves the den for the first time. Waiting for him outside is his dad who, day after day, takes the young wolf farther and farther away from the den. It’s the father’s job to teach the cub how to risk and to instill within him the courage he’ll need to step into the world and away from the safety of his mother and the den.

That’s a good visual for human moms. Mothers typically do really well at nurturing their sons. Where they struggle is allowing their boys to step out of the safety of their care and into the risk of the outside world. Their instinct is to keep their little wolves close and safe.

But, moms, if you do that, you’re taking away from your boys the sense of wildness and strength God needs them to have, so they can step away from the safety of your care and make an impact for Him in a world that’s filled with risk.

Dannah Gresh takes it a step further. She says over-protecting your son from risk is dangerous.

It’s dangerous for your boys. In adolescence, they’ll be confronted with the risk of pornography or face the danger of unhealthy relationships. They’ll need the courage and strength to resist those temptations.

It’s dangerous for the culture as well. The Lord calls good men to risk by going into places like Thailand or Amsterdam and rescuing women from sex trafficking … or by standing with courage in the public square and kicking down walls of untruth … or by going into the world and being a light for Christ.

The bumps and scrapes boys get by risking early in life prepare them for the world they’ll face when they’re older. The church won’t survive without good men in leadership who will risk. And the culture won’t survive if good men are afraid to risk and speak the truth.

That’s what’s at stake.

The Lord doesn’t promise to keep us safe, He promises to walk with us through danger. Moms, your part is to allow the Lord to lead your boys through risk, so He can instill strength and courage within them …

… because He’s depending on your wolves.

To encourage moms who could use a little help letting their boys risk, we want to return to a conversation we recorded a few years ago with author Dannah Gresh. Dannah normally speaks and writes about purity and modesty issues for young girls, but as a mom of both a son and daughters, she has some great parenting insights for us on this topic.

I hope you’ll join us today and tomorrow for “Raising Tween Boys in Today’s Culture” on your local radio station. Or tune in anytime online or via our free, downloadable mobile phone app.