Nick Stumbo grew up in a loving, Christian family, gave his life to the ministry as a 3rd generation pastor, and was married to the love of his life. From the outside, his life was perfect.
But Nick had a secret.
He learned at a young age that anything sexual should be hidden. Sex was exclusively for marriage, and anything outside of that was wrong – even talking about it.
So, when things of a sexual nature started infiltrating Nick’s life – like exposure to pornography at a friend’s house, the school bus, or sporting trips – he didn’t believe he could share it with anyone. The more secrets he kept, the more isolated he became, and the deeper into pornography he fell.
Shame kept Nick trapped in his pornography addiction for 17 years.
What’s ironic is that Nick felt alone even though his problem is a common one. According to research by Barna, 68 percent of Christian men struggle with pornography – as do 25 to 30 percent of Christian women.
Pornography is a deadly trap that will undermine your marriage, threaten your family, and destroy your faith.
But you can find freedom.
We’re airing a conversation with Nick and his wife, Michelle, as part of our “best of” for 2019. They joined us on our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Discovering God’s Freedom from Pornography” for a candid conversation about the dangers of pornography and the freedom of sexual integrity. They describe their painful cycle of confession, forgiveness, and relapse, and how porn put their marriage and ministry at risk.
You can hear their story on your local radio station. This program isn’t graphic, but it’s probably not suitable for younger children, so please use your discretion and occupy your kids elsewhere, or listen later online, on Apple Podcasts, via Google Podcasts, or take us with you on our free phone app.
I believe this is a vital topic of discussion for the Christian community. A willingness to have open, honest dialogue about sexual temptation and sexual purity in a culture that’s sexually oversaturated is crucial to discovering freedom.
As such, our conversation with Nick and Michelle isn’t about shame. It’s about learning to become healthier in Christ so that we can have healthy, strong marriages that highlight our faith in Christ to a culture that desperately needs Him.
If you feel trapped by pornography or some other hidden sin – or maybe someone you love is struggling with sexual issues and you don’t know how to help them – please contact us here at Focus on the Family. We’d like to connect you with one of our Christian counselors – someone who will listen to your story, pray with you, and direct you to practical resources in your area. Please call 800-A-FAMILY (232-6459).
Nick is the executive director of Pure Desire ministries, a parachurch organization helping to provide hope, freedom, and healing for those who are dealing with sexual brokenness. Nick and Michelle lead group sessions for men and women who are pursuing sexual health and purity.
Nick has also written a book called Setting Us Free: An Unexpected Journey of Grace that captures a lot of his story. We’d like to send it to you for a gift of any amount. Visit our website for more information. If you can’t afford it, we’ll find a way to get it to you. Thank you for your support.