Erase the Dividing Line

Many marriages are like the community of Beebe Plain, Vermont. They’re divided.

The international border between Canada and the United States runs right down the middle of Beebe Plain, Vermont. It splits the main road through town in half. It also cuts right through the middle of a building on the east side of town called the Haskell Free Library and Opera House. Inside, there’s even a black line painted on the floor that marks where one country ends and another begins.

A lot of marriages are like that. A dividing line cuts right down the middle of the relationship. On one side is her life; on the other side is his. And rarely does the line get crossed. Each spouse has their own career, their own hobbies, and their own friends. And they share little in common, except for children, a home, and whatever money they owe.

Dividing lines in a marriage eventually become walls that make intimacy a problem. They turn small issues into big ones. They push couples further apart instead of drawing them together. They make communication and problem solving more difficult, which intensifies conflict.

The glory of marriage is found in unity: two people who offer themselves to each other in humble sacrifice. The healthiest couples erase dividing lines – not so they lose their individuality, but so they become ever more unified until – as Jesus said – the two become one flesh.