Daly Focus Blog
The tingles can get you married. They can also get you divorced.
Dr. Gary Chapman has heard a lot of couples in premarital counseling talk about “the tingles” – that emotional flutter we feel when we’re attracted to each other.
“The tingles” play an important role in forming romantic relationships. They turn a simple hello into a lunch date, and before long the couple is so inseparable they decide to get married.
But the tingles fade.
A Colorado rancher once shared an insight with me that illustrates the balance between discipline and love in parenting. He said he employed two strategies for guiding his cattle to where he wanted them on his ranch. The first was a well. Cattle roam miles of grassland when they’re grazing, but they usually stay close to their water source. The second strategy was barbed wire. The barbs produce just enough discomfort to deter cattle from pushing beyond the boundary.
On our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Laying Your Life on the Line for Christ,” I’m speaking with Virginia Prodan, who grew up behind the Iron Curtain in Romania, terrorized by dictator Nicolae Ceausescu. Although he promised U.S. authorities that he would respect human and religious rights in order to gain most-favored-nation status and be awarded hundreds of millions of dollars in trade, Ceausescu’s regime confiscated Bibles, demolished churches, and persecuted Christians.
Virginia’s family members had their bank accounts seized by the government and their homes raided by armed communist sympathizers.
When Dr. Tony Evans served as a chaplain for the National Football League, he got the opportunity to speak to players on the eve of the Super Bowl. What he remembers most about that moment was the intense focus he saw in their eyes. Each player was locked in on the task at hand: winning a championship. They weren’t satisfied with a great season or a winning playoff run. They wanted a Lombardi Trophy.
What’s your Lombardi Trophy?
I love Thanksgiving.
There’s great food – thank you, Jean – and plenty of football. Most important of all, Thanksgiving is a time for thanking God for His incredible blessings.
I’m thankful for my wife and two boys and for the help we’ve been able to provide families through foster care. I’m also thankful for what God does through Focus on the Family. Marriages and preborn babies are being saved. Moms and dads are becoming better parents, and our ministry is leading people to Christ.
Many moms feel overwhelmed by the shopping, cooking, and high expectations of the holiday season.
But making memories doesn’t have to be difficult or expensive. One of author Jessica Smartt’s best memories is taking her first communion class. She doesn’t remember a lot of theology, but she does remember her mother taking her through a McDonald’s drive-thru to get a cheeseburger afterward. Just the two of them together, eating in the family pickup truck.
This time of year, it’s good to remember that a good reason for traditions is to connect with your children, to let them know that their family supports them, and to bond them deeply to their Christian faith.
It’s been over 400 years since the first Thanksgiving – and yet the more times change, the more they remain the same.
Thanksgiving 2023 comes during a highly volatile and uneven time in America’s history. Dissension and dysfunction seem to be everywhere. Anger and frustration are running high. You can feel it. You can see it.
Whether politically, economically, socially or spiritually, nobody knows for sure what is coming next – or even if it’s coming at all.
Well, truth be told, that sounds a bit like the first Thanksgiving.
Hollywood and artists tend to paint that first feast in Plymouth, Massachusetts in 1621 as this idyllic Hallmark Hall of Fame kind of moment.
In 1969, The Brady Bunch became the first sitcom in television history to depict what was then a new trend in America: a blended family. Mike and Carol Brady, who both had three children from previous relationships, strived hard each week to – as the theme song said – “somehow form a family.” Most of the problems they faced were humorous and easy to resolve in 30 minutes.
Unfortunately, things are rarely that simple in real life.
Before having children, author Heidi St. John’s confidence in God felt unshakable. A few years and a few children later, Heidi felt so discouraged that she could barely get out of bed.
She remembers waking one cold January morning and hearing her children arguing in another room. The day hadn’t even begun, and she was already defeated. She willed herself to her feet by opening her Bible and reading from the Psalms. She soon realized that, while she had placed her confidence in her own abilities, King David’s praises were rooted in his confidence in God.
Dad, don’t let your teenage daughter fool you. She needs you. I know her attitude may not always reflect that, but it’s true. She’s caught in a whirlwind of hormones and emotional upheaval. Her self-worth is under attack, and her social world is topsy-turvy. On top of that, she’s physically growing, changing, and feeling awkward. With you. With everybody.
Over the next few years, your daughter’s attitude will tempt you to disengage from her, to keep her at arm’s length.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
