Daly Focus Blog
One busy weekday morning, author Kay Wyma was backing out of her driveway when a big truck came barreling down the road and forced her to the shoulder. Frustrated and annoyed, she took a deep breath, slowed her heart rate, and realized that she had a choice to make: she could wallow in her anger and frustration, or she could be thankful that no one, including herself, had been injured.
She chose the latter. The moment she did, Kay felt compassion for the truck driver instead of condemnation.
I don’t think I’m overstating things when I say that most men have trouble opening up emotionally. Guys put up walls around their feelings for lots of reasons, but the consequence is always the same. They’re disconnected from deeper, more meaningful experiences with their spouse, children, and friends.
Men don’t usually use the word “disconnected” to describe themselves (we prefer descriptors like “lone wolf” or the “strong, silent type”), but as Shakespeare said, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” A disconnected man is one who is unaware that he is nonrelational, distant, and emotionally unavailable.
The next time your teenager doesn’t want to help out around the house, you’ve got an important decision to make. Do you want your child to live in a home or a hotel?
You see, a home is where a family lives. It’s where moms and dads and sons and daughters all contribute together to the running of the household in whatever way they’re capable. A hotel, on the other hand, is where people are waited on hand and foot and their every need is met.
Jean and I recognized early on in our parenting that our boys, Trent and Troy, needed to be parented differently. They were – and are – individuals. They each had their own personalities, needs, and interests. Sometimes that was a challenge to navigate. They did share one thing in common with each other – and with your children: the desire to be heard and valued.
Listening to the heart of your children is key to being an effective parent and having a strong relationship with them as they grow into adulthood.
It’s easy – even for Christians – to develop a negative attitude about the world. We can feel concerned and discouraged about many things – corruption in government, injustice, poverty, war, abortion.
Author Brant Hansen knows the struggle with anxiety all too well. His dad was a pastor whose hypocritical behavior and affair tore his family apart. It was a frightening and dark time for Brant, his brother, and his mother, who were forced to give up all they had and move into a small house.
One of the most inspiring parenting stories I’ve heard is about father and son, Dick and Rick Hoyt. Rick, the son, was born with cerebral palsy in 1962. Doctors said Rick would bring nothing but pain and suggested that he be institutionalized. Instead, his parents, Dick and Judy, devoted their lives to their son for nearly 60 years.
In fact, Dick was so determined to build a relationship with Rick that he ran marathons with him.
Are you “organizationally challenged”?
Keeping a house tidy and organized is a challenge for a lot of us, especially those of us who have young children. It’s like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos. When children are older, they can participate in house cleaning and common tasks like laundry and dishes, but what’s the best way to get them involved?
With me on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly is Kristi Clover. She’s a home organization expert and a mom of five kids ranging from preschool to young adults.
Could you use a simple tip to improve your marriage?
How about 100 simple tips?
Matt and Lisa Jacobson, my guests on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly, actually have them for you.
After 25 years of marriage, Matt and Lisa looked at each other one day and decided, “Let’s each write down one hundred things that we’ve done to create a loving marriage.” When they compared notes, they realized that each day is the culmination of little decisions that stack up over time.
The most effective parents are visionaries.
Let me tell you about Tom. As a young boy, he developed a hearing problem. It caused him a lot of trouble at school. Tom’s mind constantly wandered, making him disruptive in class, which frustrated his teachers. They considered him “stupid, restless, and a slow learner who asked too many questions.” All in all, his public education was a complete failure.
If that were your son, I’m sure you’d be concerned.
Thanks to the Internet and social media, we’re more connected to each other than ever. At least, we like to think we are. The fact of the matter is quite different.
Just a few years ago, only ten percent of Americans said they were lonely. According to recent research, that number has nearly doubled. The very technology we thought would draw us closer together is making us feel more isolated instead.
Our need for human connection is wired into our DNA.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
