Daly Focus Blog
Did you know that the tallest sand castle ever built was as high as a six story building? In 2021, an international team of sculptors spent three and a half weeks shaping 5,000 tons of sand into a castle 70 feet high.
Some of the bystanders wondered, “Why invest all of that time, money, and hard work into something that the wind and the waves will eventually sweep away?”
That’s a good question for you and me to answer as well.
According to the National Science Foundation:
People think an average of 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day.
80% of those thoughts are negative.
And 90% of those thoughts are repetitive.
That’s why author Ted Lowe – founder and director of MarriedPeople.org, an organization dedicated to strengthening marriages – says one of the best things you can do for your marriage is to learn how to change your own mind.
Embracing a positive mindset boosts confidence, wards off depression and anxiety, and helps manage stress.
Despite what you see on commercials, Christmas isn’t about presents or a jolly old man in a red suit. It’s also not about food, festive decorations, or family get-togethers – even though those are all wonderful things. At its core, Christmas is about the birth of Jesus.
His story is the greatest ever told because it empowers us to hold on to our faith in tough times, to believe that a light of hope can still burn bright even when our world seems dark.
In 1984, Bill Goodrich attended a Christmas Eve service at his church. A choir of cognitively impaired adults from local group homes sang Christmas carols. The people around Bill thought their performance was beautiful, but Bill was troubled. A new Christian at the time, he spent the rest of the service asking the Lord why He allowed some people to suffer the way they do.
What about the people he’d met in nursing homes, for example?
As the old saying goes, “You can choose your friends but not your family.” You discover how true that is during the holidays. Spending time with family members who see the world differently than you do can be stressful.
To fill this season with joy and peace instead of frustration and conflict, here are a few ideas to keep in mind:
First, try these three magical words: “Tell me more.” Argumentative people are less likely to escalate if they feel heard.
Relationships are the most rewarding experiences this side of heaven, but they also present a challenge. How do you restore peace and harmony to a relationship that’s struggling?
Boundaries.
God himself demonstrated why and how to create boundaries. In the Garden of Eden, He told Adam and Eve: Don’t eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Genesis 2:17). That one boundary communicated four important ideas about relationships:
Boundaries define and protect freedom.
Good marriages are built on connection points. Money. Sex. Communication. And this one, which often gets overlooked: spiritual intimacy.
As the label suggests, spiritual intimacy is when a couple is unified in their beliefs about God and spirituality. Couples who aren’t unified run into trouble. Like Maria and John. They didn’t talk much about their spiritual beliefs when they were dating. After they got married, they were caught off guard when the challenges of life put their deepest values to the test.
Many women feel overwhelmed. They’re busy from morning until night yet still don’t seem to have enough time for important things like devotions, exercise, friendships, sleep, or quality time with their families.
My wife, Jean, did a great job of keeping our family and household in order during our parenting years. But some days the strain she was under was tough. Like the evening I came home from work and Jean met me at the door.
Prayer is one of the most beneficial things you can do for your marriage.
You’ve probably heard that advice and believe it. But prayer still falls by the wayside when life gets busy and responsibilities demand your time and attention.
On our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Praying for Your Marriage Is Essential,” our guest, Jodie Berndt, is answering how to incorporate prayer into your marriage in a way that not only helps you grow closer to your spouse but deepens your relationship in Christ.
My wife, Jean, loves decorating for Christmas. If you step into our garage, you’ll notice an assortment of nearly 30 boxes and plastic bins in the rafters. They’re filled with all of the Christmas decorations we’ve accumulated over the decades. I pull everything down and haul it into the house, so Jean can do her thing. I love how beautiful our home looks when she’s done.
One year, I offered to help her. For an hour, I hung icicles on the tree and talked to her while she set up our snow village.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
