Daly Focus Blog
Author Aaron Sharp says that every new dad is like Peter Parker, the mild-mannered character in the Marvel comic series who becomes Spider-Man. A pivotal moment in Peter’s story comes when he’s bitten by a radioactive spider, and his life changes forever … only, he doesn’t immediately realize it.
For a man, that pivotal moment comes the first time his wife says, “We’re having a baby.” The man’s life changes forever … only he doesn’t immediately realize what’s coming down the pike.
What would you do if your boss asked you to train someone for your job so well that you’d no longer be needed?
That’s an important question to answer if you have a child, because that’s precisely your task as a parent.
Some parents react to the process of letting go of their children by not letting go. They cling to their need to feel needed. But the task of every parent is to work yourself out of a job by raising children who become adults capable of standing on their own two feet.
Our culture is so toxic for young girls that an increasing number are suffering from a growing list of troubles – from low self-esteem and anxiety to depression and eating disorders. What’s the answer?
It isn’t so much a “what” as it is a “who.” Mothers are instrumental in helping their daughters navigate a world that is often against them.
One of Mom’s key roles is being a good listener. Teen girls usually seek out Mom for advice and feel most comfortable sharing their heart with her.
Jesus’ mother was Mary.
The prophet Samuel’s mother was Hannah.
King David’s mother?
The Bible doesn’t tell us. But she must have had tremendous insight into how to raise a boy to become man. Everyone remembers David for conquering Goliath. Yet, his strength and trust in the Lord were developed as a teenager in the field:
“But David said to Saul, “Your servant used to keep sheep for his father. And when there came a lion, or a bear, and took a lamb from the flock, I went after him and struck him and delivered it out of his mouth.
Do you feel like a failure as a parent?
At Focus on the Family, we hear from thousands of parents who do.
Formulaic parenting is a common reason for this. It’s the go-to method for a lot of moms and dads. They believe that parenting ought to be predictable. The right input should guarantee the right outcome. When it doesn’t, they wonder, “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with my child?”
A better approach is something called “trust-based relational parenting,” an idea that many say has revolutionized their parenting.
Let me tell you about a boy named Tom. At an early age, he developed a hearing problem, which caused him a lot of trouble at school. He was easily distracted. He frustrated his teachers by disrupting the class and steering the conversation in random directions. His teachers considered him “stupid, restless, and a slow learner who asked too many questions.” Tom’s public education was a complete failure.
If that were your child, how would you react?
Have you ever tried to push a fully inflated beach ball under the water?
You can only hold it beneath the surface for so long. Sooner or later, your strength will give out, and the ball will pop back up.
It’s a lot like parenting.
To explain how, we’ve invited Milan and Kay Yerkovich back to our microphones to discuss how to develop a deeper connection with your children by understanding their love styles.
Milan and Kay explain the coping mechanisms we develop in childhood to avoid relational pain.
Have you ever wished you could change something about yourself? I’m sure we all have. We wish we were taller or shorter, that we had curly hair or straight, or that we could throw a ball or play an instrument like someone else.
It’s not unusual to wish for strength in areas where you’re weak, or talent where you’re not gifted. But it’s a short leap from that common desire to losing sight of the purpose for which God created you.
My wife, Jean, is a living embodiment of Proverbs 16:24: “Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.”
Every time I call her on the phone, she answers with a positive tone that lets me know she’s glad to hear from me. Her voice is a moment of respite for me in what can often be a busy and stressful schedule.
Positive words bless people, but it’s not always easy to speak them.
My wife Jean and I have raised two boys, Trent and Troy. Throughout their childhoods, I was able to enjoy a lot of father/son time with them. Just the three of us. Baseball games. Football games. Camping. Fishing.
Looking back on it, the one thing I would change is that I would have done more with each of them individually, to invest one on one time with them. Individual quality time is a great way to show a child love.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
