What should a woman look for in a husband? What should a man look for in a wife?
Marriage is one of the biggest decisions a person can make and, yet, a lot of men and women are unprepared to answer that basic question.
Physical attraction is probably the most common attribute people consider, and it’s not unimportant. But some people never rise beyond that initial connection point. They’re fueled primarily by emotion and sexual attraction. But marriage is a relationship with a whole person, not just a body.
Also problematic is when the engagement is too short. Couples who rush toward marriage never get below the surface and discover their future spouse at a deeper level because they don’t see each other in a variety of different situations.
What is he like when he’s stuck in traffic and late for an appointment? How does she act when faced with the stress of a hospitalized loved one? How does he treat his mother? What’s her relationship like with her father? What is he like when he’s around his friends? How does she feel about children?
Our speaker on today’s and tomorrow’s broadcasts is Alistair Begg, the senior pastor at Parkside Church in Cleveland, OH since 1983. He says the most common problem he faces as a pastor is couples who come to him to be married, but they’ve never seen each other in real-life situations.
When people date, they’re usually on their best behavior. It’s in the course of the journey that you see a person’s true character.
That’s why image doesn’t matter as much as character. Age takes its toll on all of us. To invest in a person as simply a physical package is to set yourself up for a fall because physical beauty doesn’t last forever.
In this recording, Alistair is speaking to a group of college students, but he’s sharing principles that apply to marriage hopefuls of any age. It’s a lot easier to have a great relationship when you’re married to a person with the sort of Christ-like characteristics Alistair outlines.
For women, here’s his advice for what to look for in a husband:
- He’s committed to having a growing relationship with Jesus Christ.
- He should be an individual of obvious integrity.
- He should be able to lead boldly.
- He should display the ability to love sacrificially.
- He should be able to laugh heartily.
- He should model genuine humility.
For men, here’s Alistair’s advice for what to look for in a wife:
- Like her husband, a wife should having a growing relationship with Jesus Christ.
- She should possess an inner beauty that goes deeper than her skin.
- She should be an initiative taker with an attitude of submission.
- She should build her husband’s confidence.
- She should display kindness that touches others.
- She should have a sense of humor that braves adversity.
Over the next couple of programs, Alistair will explain each of these points in full to help couples build not just a good marriage, but a biblical marriage. The difference between those two is critical. The Bible says that our marriages should be like the relationship between Christ and the church.
In addition to his role as a pastor, Alistair is the daily speaker on the national radio program, Truth for Life. With his Scottish brogue and down-to-earth preaching of the Word, he’s a favorite of millions.