husband Archives - Jim Daly

What to Do When You and Your Spouse Are Different

When Jean and I entered premarital counseling, we were goo-goo-eyed and knew that we were meant for each other. We enjoyed most of the same things and were alike in almost every way.

When we finished our last session a week later, that had all changed. We were both thinking, “Wow, we are nothing alike,” and we were wondering, “Are we going to be okay?”

At some point, every couple begins to recognize their differences. And something strange happens when they do: The whole idea of “two becoming one” gets turned into, “My spouse should become more like me.”

How do couples manage their differences effectively?

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, family, husband, marriage, wife May 22, 2018 by Jim Daly

Returning to a Godly Perspective on Sex and Romance

One of the most powerful forces God created for humanity exists in the realm of love, sex, and romance. The potential for both pleasure and blessing is virtually immeasurable. So is the potential for destruction.

As a group, Millennials and younger generations don’t tend to believe that. A significant percentage see sex as a purely physical experience. That shouldn’t surprise anyone. From an evolutionary standpoint, there isn’t anything sacred about sex. If there is no God, then sex is strictly biological.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, intimacy, marriage, wife May 17, 2018 by Jim Daly

How to Put Christ on Display in Your Marriage

Most couples come into a relationship with a sense of idealism. They’re so much in love and so much alike and so happy.

Over time, though, they discover that they’re really not that much alike – and maybe not so happy, either. That’s when a marriage ends up being all about “me” and “my happiness,” instead of “us” and “our happiness.”

Dr. Larry Crabb says the central problem in marriages like that is “unrecognized self-centeredness.” We ask, “What can my spouse do for me?” rather than “What can I offer my spouse that would make a difference in their life?” Instead of ministering, we manipulate.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, faith, husband, marriage, wife May 7, 2018 by Jim Daly

Harnessing the Power of Word Pictures

Early in their marriage, Dr. John Trent’s wife would get up early and cook him breakfast. One morning, he came into the kitchen and instead of bacon and eggs, he found a book. It was one of John’s textbooks from college.

She said, “Do you remember when you first got this book? You couldn’t wait to read every page. Now you use it as a door stop for your study.” She paused then said, “That’s what our marriage feels like.”

John’s wife had given him a word picture.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, marriage, wife May 4, 2018 by Jim Daly

What’s Your Love Style?

Are you an avoider?

A pleaser?

How about a chaotic or a vacillator?

Those are four of the five love styles you and your spouse likely see in your marriage. Their various combinations describe the core patterns driving a couple’s interactions and the problems they cause.

Avoiders and pleasers don’t experience much conflict, but for all the wrong reasons. Avoiders don’t like to have honest conversations because they get messy, and pleasers worry their spouse will get mad.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, marriage, wife March 26, 2018 by Jim Daly

How to Keep Gender Differences from Driving Your Marriage Crazy

Mary and Joseph both heard from God about the coming birth of their son, Jesus. But have you ever noticed how differently the Lord communicated that to each of them?

When the angel Gabriel came to Mary to tell her that she would bring the Christ child into the world, Mary asked, “How can this be?” (Luke 1:34, ESV). She wanted to know in what way God’s plans could happen.

Gabriel patiently outlined the full plan: “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, marriage, wife March 8, 2018 by Jim Daly

Loving Your Spouse Day by Day

What is it that God wants out of our marriages?

Do we think about that? We know what we want out of our marriage, and we know what we expect our spouse to provide us. But what does God want?

Well, much of what God wants for you is wired in to you. A woman’s deepest need is to know that her husband loves her. A man’s deepest need is to know that his wife respects him.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, marriage, wife February 27, 2018 by Jim Daly

What Is God’s Design for Sex in Marriage?

God has given married couples a wedding present.

Sex.

The Lord designed physical intimacy to be enjoyed by both husbands and wives. First Corinthians 7 tells us that sex is rooted in mutuality. Husbands are to be sensitive to their wives’ needs, and wives are to be sensitive to their husbands’ needs. Marriage is about serving one another, not demanding your own rights.

Sadly, we live in a broken world that undermines God’s sacred designs. Secular culture portrays sex as primarily for the man.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, intimacy, marriage, relationships February 15, 2018 by Jim Daly

Six Free Gifts for Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day marks the culmination of National Marriage Week here in the United States. Conceived as a “collaborative campaign to strengthen individual marriages, reduce the divorce rate, and build a culture that fosters strong marriages,” the effort mirrors the ongoing daily work of our ministry.

The traditions surrounding Valentine’s Day may frustrate some, but I’ve always enjoyed them. Jean has been my Valentine for three-plus decades now, and I consider her a gift.

For my fellow male readers, I’m going to assume you’ve already taken care of the cards, the flowers and chocolates.

Topics: Current Events Tags: husband, intimacy, marriage, sex, wife February 14, 2018 by Jim Daly

Affair Proofing Your Marriage

Marriage is central to what we do here at Focus on the Family.

We believe that marriage is the foundation of the family. We also believe that God’s design for marriage is a relationship where both husband and wife are committed to loving and caring for one another for a lifetime.

The problem is, men and women are selfish creatures, and their selfishness comes out in all kinds of unhealthy ways. One of the most devastating aberrations is an affair.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, intimacy, marriage, sex January 30, 2018 by Jim Daly