family Archives

Changing Your Mindset in Marriage

According to the National Science Foundation, people think an average of 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day.

Eighty percent of those thoughts are negative.

And 90% of those thoughts are repetitive.

That’s why author Ted Lowe – the founder and director of MarriedPeople.org, an organization dedicated to strengthening marriages – says one of the best things you can do for your marriage is learn how to change your mind.

Embracing a positive mindset boosts confidence, wards off depression and anxiety, and helps manage stress.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage July 24, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

What Lies Beneath

As a boy, I spent time in foster care then lived with my dad for a while. He hadn’t been a part of my life for years, but for that short season he tried to be a real father to me. Since he didn’t know how to connect with me through conversation, he showed me affection the only way he could: he cooked.

One Saturday morning, he slid some bacon and eggs in front of me, and I noticed a yellow spreading across the plate.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family July 20, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Rejecting Divorce and Choosing to Stay

Fifteen years into their marriage, an otherwise normal lunch date between Carey and Toni Nieuwhof turned into a disastrous argument.

As they remember it now, Carey complained about something, which triggered Toni to shut down, which compelled Carey to persist in his argument, which escalated Toni’s emotions until she exploded in anger. By the end of the lunch, Toni was so frustrated that she threw her wedding ring at him and said, “I don’t want this anymore.”

It’s heartbreaking to see married couples reach a point of desperation and hopelessness.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage July 18, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Double Dating

Married couples need to spend one-on-one time together to be healthy. But they also need a community of couples who positively influence their relationship.

Your marriage is not an island. You need to interact with other couples – to invest in their lives and for them to invest in yours. This is especially important because so many people live far away from members of their extended family and can’t benefit from their influence. If you don’t have family support, the influence of good friends is invaluable.

Topics: Family and Home/ Uncategorized Tags: family, marriage July 13, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Becoming Friends with Your In-Laws

Do you get along with your in-laws?

If you catch yourself snickering at that question, who could blame you? In-law jokes (particularly about mothers-in-law) are a mainstay of modern comedy routines and a common stereotype in movies and television shows. But within every joke there is a kernel of truth. And the truth here is that in-law relationships can be difficult.

What’s the best way to work through this delicate area of marriage?

Jean and I don’t have a great deal of experience in this area.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage July 12, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Talking to Your Kids About Sexuality and Gender

If you’re the parent of young children, maybe you’ll relate to this scenario.

Amy Davison’s children were watching a cartoon about a girl who had a crush on one of her classmates. Throughout the episode, she put love notes in the classmate’s locker. At the end, when the show revealed that the locker belonged to another girl, Amy’s ten-year-old daughter turned and asked, “Wait, what just happened? Does she like girls?”

And just like that, Amy was forced to have a conversation with her young child about the LGBT world.

Topics: Current Events Tags: family, parenting July 10, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

The Best Choices You Can Make for Your Marriage

Researchers say that, on average, a person makes 35,000 decisions a day.

Coffee creamer or black?

Get out of bed now or later?

Scratch our head with our left hand or our right?

Answer our phone or not?

We make so many choices that we often don’t recognize that our ability to choose is even involved.

Like this one: loving our spouse.

We talk about love as if it’s an outside force. We say, “It was love at first sight.” Or we “fell in love.” We chalk up love to chance or chemistry instead of a conscious decision to act toward our spouse in loving ways.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, marriage July 7, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Nurturing Fathers

I’ve known a lot of guys who think nurturing children is mom’s job, not dad’s. Fatherhood should be about strength, they say.

I agree, but instead of picturing a bouquet of flowers, picture a mighty oak tree. It’s the tree’s strength that allows it to provide and protect and nurture the wildlife around it.

That’s fatherhood. Nurturing dads have strong character, but a gentle spirit that enables them to handle discipline issues without criticizing or being harsh.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, parenting July 6, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Giving Your Teen Freedom to Become an Adult

When should a parent decide, “My child is old enough to live completely free of my influence”?

By the way, “Never!” is not a good answer.

Children on their way to adulthood have always struggled for independence against their parents. What’s changed is how parents view childhood between the ages of 13 and 20.

The concept of “adolescence” has only been around for 100 years or so. The terms “adolescent” and “teenager” were first used around 1941.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, parenting July 5, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

The Golden Triangle of Freedom

America has functioned remarkably well for over 200 years.

Much of that success can be attributed to what historians call the “Golden Triangle of Freedom.” The three points of the triangle are:

Liberty.

Virtue.

Faith.

The relationship between the three is important. Each one relies on the other for its existence and well-being. Liberty requires virtue. Virtue requires faith. Faith requires liberty.

Liberty is freedom. It’s the ability to govern oneself. That means you’re free to choose your own path so long as what you do positively benefits everyone else in the community.

Topics: Current Events Tags: faith, family July 4, 2023 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura