Most couples come into a relationship with a sense of idealism. They’re so much in love and so much alike and so happy.
Over time, though, they discover that they’re really not that much alike – and maybe not so happy, either. That’s when a marriage ends up being all about “me” and “my happiness,” instead of “us” and “our happiness.”
Dr. Larry Crabb says the central problem in marriages like that is “unrecognized self-centeredness.” We ask, “What can my spouse do for me?” rather than “What can I offer my spouse that would make a difference in their life?” Instead of ministering, we manipulate.