Daly Focus Blog
With the exception of the loss of a child, nothing takes an emotional toll on a family quite like the devastation rendered by divorce.
In fact, since Focus on the Family’s inception in 1977, the preservation and promotion of marriage has been at the forefront of our ministry’s efforts. From our broadcasts to our books, programs, articles and numerous other forms of media, championing the marital union and preventing divorce has been one of our top priorities.
If it’s true that every cloud has a silver lining, is it possible that virus-related disruptions in divorce filings and court proceedings could possibly buy seemingly incompatible couples more time to work out their differences and save their marriages?
I think so.
Since the virulent pathogen began wreaking havoc in mid-March, courts and local municipalities that process divorce have been upended. From canceled hearings to shuttered county courthouses, it’s become a lot more difficult for couples to untangle or sever the proverbial marital knot.
There’s good news about bad marriages: No matter how dire your circumstances, there is hope. When a marriage enters dangerous territory, the journey out isn’t easy, but the results can be beautiful.
Dr. David Clarke has a proven 90-day strategy for getting a broken marriage on track toward healing and intimacy. He says healing begins by identifying the type of marriage you’re in:
First is the couple who admits they’re unhappy and struggling, but are willing to work on it.
Jesus could have judged the woman caught in adultery (John 8:3-11). She was guilty, after all. The crowd knew it. She knew it, too. And according to the strict law of Moses, she deserved death by stoning.
Rocks in hand, the men dragged the woman through the streets, and asked Jesus for her final verdict. Instead of condemning her, Jesus forgave her.
That story from the book of John is helpful for couples whose marriages have been assaulted by the betrayal of adultery.
Jeff and Cheryl Scruggs were married for ten years … the first time.
Their life together started perfectly. They moved to Los Angeles in their mid-twenties and were living the California lifestyle. They were successful at their jobs, they made a lot of money, and they even had an ocean-front home with all of the right stuff to fill it.
But for Cheryl, marriage was empty.
She thought the lack of intimacy between her and Jeff would eventually correct itself.
“Here’s the story of a lovely lady, who was bringing up three very lovely girls…”
Most of you could probably finish that theme song from memory. The Brady Bunch was the quintessential television family of the early 1970’s, largely because of its wholesome, albeit simplistic, portrayal of blended families.
In the world of television sitcoms, problems are cleanly resolved by the end of each 30-minute episode. But let’s face it, rebuilding a family is rarely as simple as Mike and Carol Brady made it appear.
In 1995, employees at the five-story Sampoong department store in Seoul, South Korea, noticed cracks developing on the top floor around one of the support columns. Despite warnings from civil engineers, the store’s owner refused to close the building for repairs.
It was a minor problem, he insisted.
In reality, the crack was merely a symptom of a much larger structural failure. That became evident on June 29 when the entire building collapsed, killing over 500 people and wounding nearly 1,000 more.
If you made a list of all the things in your life you never thought would happen, situations you never could never have imagined yourself being in, what would you write down?
For some of you, picking up the broken pieces of your life and starting over again with a blended family might be at the top of that list.
This new chapter of life may have come about through death or divorce or some other circumstance, but the challenge is the same: how to overcome the difficulties common to blended families and to give this new part of your life its best chance to thrive.
Every now and then our radio broadcast covers a topic that breaks my heart.
This is one of them.
October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month here in the U.S., so we’re gearing today’s and tomorrow’s programs toward creating awareness about domestic violence and offering information and hope to those who may be suffering abuse themselves.
Some of our listeners might be thinking, “Why would Focus be talking about a subject like this on Christian radio?” Well, the sad truth is, domestic violence happens within the Christian community as well, so we need to talk about it openly and honestly.
Back in May, I shared with you the news that the National Institute of Marriage (NIM) was joining Focus on the Family. What made this coming together so exciting was NIM’s specialty is crisis intervention for marriages that are on the brink of divorce.
Through multiple-day intensive marriage retreats for couples who are literally out of options when it comes to salvaging their relationships, the counselors at NIM are able to offer solid, biblical counsel to these couples that help them achieve hope and healing.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
