Daly Focus Blog
Brian and Cherie Lowe paid off $127,482.30 in debt in just over four years. They know that number to the penny because, as they’ll tell you, when you put in the work and the sacrifice to pay off a dollar amount that high, you remember it to the penny. How did they do it?
Financial foreplay.
Yep, you read that correctly. That’s a term Brian and Cherie use to explain how intricately connected finances are with marital intimacy.
On Easter Sunday in 1972, Raul Ries waited for his family to come home … so he could kill them.
Raul had grown up with an abusive, alcoholic father who taught him to handle problems with violence. Raul was in and out of trouble throughout his teen years until at eighteen, he was arrested and given a choice: prison or the military. He chose the Marines and was sent to Vietnam. After 11 months of bad behavior, he was bound in shackles and a straightjacket and spent six months in a naval hospital.
According to pediatricians, babies should be lifting their heads when they’re around 4 months old and rolling over by 5 or 6 months old. They should be taking their first steps around 9 to 12 months and walking unassisted between 14 and 15 months, probably no later than 18 months.
Most parents know their children should be feeding themselves by a certain age, talking by a certain age, and hitting the right height and weight markers by certain ages.
My friend and new Focus on the Family colleague, Dr. Meg Meeker, is a highly acclaimed pediatrician who has spent the past 30 years treating children, helping parents, and writing, teaching and speaking on numerous issues that impact the family. One of the best things I appreciate about Dr. Meg is that she’s practical and regularly addresses the issues parents and children are facing.
Today, I pose a question to her that I think every parent has asked or pondered:
Is the affirmation you give your kids hurting or helping them?
When you ask couples which household issues influence the success of a marriage, things like kids and finances usually rise to the top. But did you know that chores rank third on that list?!
How can something as simple as housework fuel conflict in a marriage? Rather easily it turns out. As we all know, life gets busy. Not long after the “I do’s,” couples tend to get focused on (or maybe I should say, “distracted by”) the household tasks they care about, while forgetting the burdens their spouse is carrying.
The Bible begins with marriage and ends with marriage.
That ought to tell us something about the importance God places on it. He’s infused it with profound meaning, both as a cultural institution and as one of the most significant relationships we can experience. It’s the bedrock of God’s design for families.
So where does that leave singles?
Throughout the Bible we’re reminded that God created us for community. No one is meant to be alone.
One of the most heartbreaking letters I’ve read was from a grown woman who wrote to Focus and recounted the divorce of her parents when she was a little girl. Her dad told her, “Your mom and I aren’t capable of being together, so I’m leaving. But I’ll always be there for you. I’ll see you on weekends. I’ll see you on your birthday.”
She never saw her dad again.
That father made a lot of promises, and never kept one.
Did you know that about 39 percent of evangelicals believe that “mercy killing” for someone who’s suffering is morally permissible?
That raises another question: How many Christians today understand the Bible’s perspective on suffering?
Few people have the credibility to address issues as poignant as suffering and the value of human life like Joni Eareckson Tada. Fifty years ago, she broke her neck in a diving accident and was left a quadriplegic. Since then, she’s been a tireless advocate for people with disabilities and has stood against the growing movement that promotes suicide for disabled and disadvantaged people.
Marci Seither and her husband owned a sawmill in Northern California. A customer hired them to remove a huge tree from the spot where their new home would be built. The homeowners thought it a shame to lose such a beautiful tree and planned to recycle the lumber by using it in the house’s construction.
Once the tree was cut down, however, they discovered that the wood was too weak to be used. The tree rings were too far apart.
My son Troy’s love language is physical touch. When he was younger, he was the first one to run into my arms when I got home each night. Even now as a teenager, he loves when I give him a big bear hug.
My older son, Trent, is more introverted and cerebral. I’ve asked him if he’s okay with hugs, and he says yes, but sometimes he stands so rigid he’s like hugging a pole. I have to remind him to use his arms.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
