Daly Focus Blog
Trevor Hendershot is quite a young man. I think you’d like meeting him.
Cheerleaders in his high school once made banners to cheer him on, and he was so popular he was voted homecoming king. He was a little quirky, too. He had a habit of loudly singing Christian songs in the hallway before, during, and after school. He gave everyone he talked to a high-five, a hug, or a fist bump.
He’s now in his mid-20’s and works for the Los Angeles Angels, a Major League Baseball franchise.
Did you know that researchers can predict with almost 95-percent accuracy whether a couple’s marriage will succeed or fail?
Their predictions are based on how a couple fights – not how frequently the couple fights or even what they fight about, but howcouples engage each other in conflict.
Researchers discovered four elements to marital conflict that are destructive to a relationship. Dr. John Gottman calls them “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.” They are:
Criticism
Defensiveness
Contempt
Stonewalling
Wouldn’t it be great if couples could avoid the Four Horsemen and use conflict to invigorate their marriage rather than allowing it to burn up their love life?
Author Tricia Goyer says she never thought she had an anger problem … until she had to deal with children who had anger problems. She and her husband had three kids of their own and adopted seven others.
Their adopted children had emotions that Tricia didn’t know how to handle. They struggled with pain from their past. They were angry from being away from their biological families. Some of them had faced difficulties in foster care.
Has one of your children ever thrown a world-class fit in a store?
My son Trent did that once when he was little. He wanted a candy bar while he was with his mom in the checkout aisle. I was out of town, so Jean was alone with him. Trent had a meltdown because he couldn’t have the chocolate he was after.
Jean was a new mom and was embarrassed that she couldn’t get Trent under control.
On today’s edition of our Focus on the Family broadcast, “Defeating the Darkness of Abortion,” we’re going “behind the scenes” of an abortion clinic. Our tour guide is Kathy Sparks, and as you’ll hear, she trained in every area of an abortion facility – from the telephones to the surgical room.
She has a riveting story to tell.
Kathy was raised Catholic and pro-life. In college, feminism drew her to adopt a pro-choice outlook.
Has reality set in on your dreams yet?
It will, you know.
Not on all of them, of course. But enough.
Maybe you never got the career you wanted. Or the marriage you dreamed of. Or the baby you hoped for.
The question is, how do you come to terms with your unfulfilled dreams?
Author Chrystal Evans Hurst understands what you’re going through. She’s also walked the road of discontentment before.
In college, she didn’t handle her freedom well and became a teenage mom.
Teaching character to children and motivating them to embrace change can be a challenge. So where do you begin?
Dr. Kathy Koch says you do it by strengthening your relationship with your child. You can help your child feel known and understood and intentionally impart character qualities like resilience, humility, self-respect, respect for others, and self-control.
It comes through relationship. You first model those qualities, then you guide your children as they learn to interact with life the same way.
I’ll bet you remember the moment your life changed.
It may have been in childhood or even as an adult. But someone said something to you that was hurtful and that moment changed your entire perception of yourself from that point forward.
For me, it was ninth grade. I was in my high school’s weight room, getting ready for football season. Coach Logan walked through the weight room, looked at me, and said, “Man, you’ve got bird legs.
Imagine growing up in a loving, Christian family, giving your life to ministry as a 3rdgeneration pastor, and being married to the love of your life.
But you have a secret.
Nick Stumbo was that man. He learned at a young age that anything sexual should be secretive. Sex was exclusively for marriage, and anything outside of that was wrong – even talking about it.
So when things of a sexual nature started entering into Nick’s life – like exposure to pornography at a friend’s house, the school bus, or sporting trips – his reaction was, “I can’t share about this with anyone.
What’s your definition of a hero?
Do they wear capes? Do they have superhuman strength? The ability to leap tall buildings?
When I think of heroes, I think of my football coach in high school, Paul Moro. He shaped a lot of teenage boys’ character and helped them learn to play football along the way.
I also think of Mrs. Bandy, my elementary school nurse. I was living in a dysfunctional foster home and would sit on the hill behind my school at recess and cry.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
