Daly Focus Blog
Happy Independence Day!
As you enjoy barbecues, fireworks, and family time today, I encourage you to tune in to our Focus on the Family Broadcast “The Role of Faith in America’s Founding.” Joining us is historian Rod Gragg, an adjunct professor of history at Coastal Carolina University, and an award-winning author of more than 20 books.
We’re talking about Ron’s book Forged in Faith: How Faith Shaped the Birth of the Nation: 1607-1776.
Instilling virtue in your children is pretty serious business. After all, the adult world is a competitive place, and you want your kids to be prepared.
Unfortunately, that desire leads many parents to bury their children beneath some pretty harsh standards. At report card time, they question why their nearly straight-A student didn’t get that onegrade a little higher. Or maybe they snap at their teenager if he or she shows the slightest sign of irresponsibility.
That kind of response doesn’t adequately reflect most parents’ heart for their children.
Numerous studies show that masculinity is in crisis. Boys are struggling to mature into competent young men, and men and fathers in general are denigrated in the culture.
Even when the criticism is justified, the solution to those problems isn’tto denigrate masculinity. It’s to teach boys how to harness manhood and to channel it in proper ways.
That’s where you come in, mom.
For every study that shows boys are in trouble there’s another showing that boys grow into healthy, strong, and courageous young men when they have healthy and secure attachments with their mothers.
The tingles can get you married. They can also get you divorced.
Dr. Gary Chapman hears a lot about “the tingles.” It begins when couples come to him for premarital counseling, and he asks, “Why do you want to get married?”
However else they answer, one reason they always include is: “We love each other.”
To that, Dr. Chapman asks, “What do you mean, ‘We love each other’?”
After exchanging awkward looks, the couple will usually say something that equates to “the tingles” to which Dr.
The phone company made me mad.
At least, I thoughtit was their fault. I couldn’t get them to understand that their customer service was terrible. They continually overcharged me and disconnected my boys’ phones even though I hadn’t asked them to do it. I had to call them repeatedly for months and had a terrible time getting my account straightened out.
I tried to stay patient, but I finally reached the end of my rope, and the poor customer service representative got the brunt of my attitude.
Forgiveness is a beautiful thing. But, boy, is it difficult.
It doesn’t matter if you’re talking about forgiving yourself or forgiving others, forgiveness doesn’t come naturally to us. In fact, our wounds can be so deep, the struggle to forgive can only be described as “desperate.”
That’s how Duck Dynasty’s Al and Lisa Robertson describe their struggle to forgive each other after their marriage ran aground. Their wounds were too deep to heal apart from the strength and the grace of God.
Many of the problems in the church, in our families, and in society could be solved if men were spiritually and emotionally mature – that is, if they were able to meaningfully connect with their God, their wives, and their children.
Men’s ministries often focus on a man’s outward behavior but ignore the deeper influences. Men shouldn’t be coddled like little boys, they should be challenged as men. A man needs another man to step into his life and to challenge him to mature from the little boy he was into the man God is calling him to be.
King Artaxerxes commissioned Nehemiah to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem. Nehemiah and his men set to work with trowels in one hand and with swords in the other, defending against enemies on all sides (Neh. 4:17).
In many ways, married couples face a similar challenge. With one hand, they’re building their marriage, their children, and their careers. With the other, they’re wielding the sword of the Word of God and defending their families against a culture that’s increasingly hostile.
Social
media. Cyberbullying. Peer pressure. Drug and alcohol abuse. Pornography. Depression.
Suicide.
Parenting
teenagers is not for the faint of heart.
Moms
and dads play a critical role in guiding their children through the challenges that
arise in the teen years. Their mission is not to protect their children from every
adversity, but to train them to develop the faith and strength of character that
will carry them through it.
A
helpful goal is to parent your teenager toward becoming a responsible adult rather
than toward short-term obedience.
Everybody has moments where they feel a little sad. But some people encounter depression so fierce they don’t know if they’ll ever come out of it again.
Counselors identify six things that lead us to feel overwhelmed, hopeless, and helpless:
A traumatic eventStrained relationshipsSerious health problemsCrushing disappointmentUnchangeable circumstancePainful loss
Kay Warren has experienced all of those. Kay co-founded Saddleback Church with her husband, RickWarren, in California in 1979. She had been sexually abused, battled cancer and depression, and spent years trying to help her son, Matthew, battle his own depression – a battle she and Rick lost when Matthew died by suicide at the age of 27.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
